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I know this pattern is waiting for me at home; I think it came in the mail just as I was leaving (from eBay seller Simmons Books). It’s oddly perfect; it has all of my fetishistic desires in a pattern: square neckline, short kimono sleeves, midriff band, full skirt — it’s so best I’m nearly terrified to make it, as what if all those things together somehow cancel each other out? like the time I made tea (I was about ten, I think) thinking “I like tea with milk, and I like tea with lemon, tea with lemon and milk need to be GREAT!” (It wasn’t.)

Luckily this little break has not been me (as usual) trying to do all the things I like, all at the same time. I just chose ONE thing I really like (watching my kid have fun) and did that. So what if it involved amusement parks (or as they’re called here in Florida, “attractions”)? and accompanying him on rides that made me deliberately unfocus my eyes, the better not to sag against the WHOLLY inadequate “safety” restraints in gibbering terror? and eating only things that had been fried (twice-fried, if possible)? despite the grease, and the terror, and the finding out after three hours in the sun that the SPF 40 I’d been slathering on everyone within arm’s reach had expired in 2005, this little trip [turned out to be] surprisingly fun. So what if I ended up spending the whole (interminable) three circuits of the Ferris wheel staring fixedly at the floor of the gondola and imploring a wriggling seven-year-old to keep his little butt ON the seat? It makes a good story, right? (I didn’t used to be terrified of heights, and I’m still not, at least not for me. I don’t care if *I* die from an overenthusiastic application of the law of gravity. Everyone’s gotta go somehow, right? but I really, really, really don’t want to enjoy someone else go that way. especially not any individual I spent a lot of time and effort personally MAKING in my WOMB.)

So despite having really took pleasure in myself here doing just one thing at a time, I’m ready to go home, resume my normal semicompetent multitasking, and see if this overdetermined pattern is as good as it looks. If not, I’ll go find a pattern that has just one of my top-five fave details and concentrate on making that one the best I can.

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